It was what Joe Rohr said for greetings, farewells and positive vibes in between.
It is what Kristen Rohr has been striving to be ever since Joe suffered a fatal heart attack at age 44 on July 17, 2017.
Kristen did not just lose her husband of three years. The Grand Canyon University beach volleyball head coach also lost her best friend of almost 10 years and her Lopes assistant coach of two years.
For everyone who knew Joe, especially Kristen, he remains wonderful to remember and painful to miss. His impact lives within GCU players and their leader, who endured the passing of her father five months later.
Today, Kristen smiles at Joe's memory, coaches in his spirit and adjusts to life like the sand shifting beneath her feet at GCU Beach Volleyball Stadium.
"I feel really happy with every part of my life right now," Rohr said in an office dotted with players' uplifting notes. "I really love my job. I have amazing friends. I learned how strong of a person I am."
No ordinary Joe
Kristen and Joe met while playing pro beach volleyball in 2007, when they dug each other as much as balls heading toward the sand. They shared a passion for the sport, but she also had found someone who provoked deep talks and shared her passion to help others.
They coached volleyball together in Florida, starting a club program with his workout strengths supplementing her technical coaching skills. They teamed as a high school coaching staff and grew their club to add beach volleyball, an emerging sport nationally.
           Joe and Kristen Rohr
Six months after the newlywed Rohrs bought a house in Sarasota, Fla., in 2015, GCU officials called Kristen during their search for a new beach volleyball coach. Kristen became the Lopes' head coach, and Joe joined the move and then the staff.
Joe had an office but usually wound up in hers. Off campus, they tried to break from volleyball, but even a movie at home would be interrupted by Joe's idea for a team lineup.
"We really complemented each other," Kristen said. "I don't know if there are many people who could work nonstop with their significant other. We had a passion for growing the sport and enjoyed being around each other. It felt easy."
Former GCU All-American player Molly Turner confirmed, "They made it look easy. It was a power team you wouldn't get anywhere else."
Sudden loss
Joe's father and mother passed away in their 40s and 50s, respectively, because of health issues. But the muscular athlete was not interested in medical checkups.
When he passed away, it was a devastating blow with nothing to foretell it. The Rohrs had gone on a dinner date and returned home, where he died in his sleep.
"We really don't even know what it was from," she said.
Kristen moved into a hotel and then an apartment, returning to their house only to move out. Their Florida family and friends bid Joe farewell near their Sarasota roots with a memorial tournament and sunset celebration on Anna Maria Island three weeks later.
Suddenly, it was August, when students return to GCU, and Kristen's concern turned toward the players who adored and admired Joe.
"By far, I'd say she's the strongest person I've ever met," said Rohr's current roommate, Lopes women's golf head coach Lauren Giesecke, who comforted Rohr along with women's golf assistant coach Kelli Bowers and Director of Compliance Sherraine Pencil.
"She's always such a positive person. That's the thing that Joe probably gave her the most – that positive sense of everything happens for a reason. They both have a sense of what's going to make us better. One, as a couple, but then their team, too. Those were their kids. They just love each one of them."
Coping and coaching
Once they were back on campus, the players arranged a celebration on their courts, where they put their favorite memories of Joe on paper and shared tears and laughs.
"I don't know how I would've got through it without them," Kristen said. "I wanted the girls to know that I really enjoy bringing up memories. 'Don't be afraid to share it. Keep his memory alive.' "
   Ex-Lope Molly Turner with the Rohrs
They wore "Be well" wristbands. Butterflies became a symbol of Joe and appeared frequently. Turner had one tattooed on her wrist and saw one at her first pro match.
"I was devastated," said Turner, a pro player who now outfoxes Olympians with skills taught by the Rohrs. "I started having conversations with Kristen and I can see him in her. When someone passes, you think you'll never hear from them again. But they give identical advice.
"She's the strongest person I know."
It was not easy at all. In her first return to GCU about a month after his passing, she broke down in the parking garage and left campus.
Slowly, Kristen's sadness became empowerment. When her father died on Dec. 7, 2017, at age 86, she became a rock for her mother. Over the holidays, she made an outward decision to honor Joe rather than be sad about him.
"This too shall pass," her biceps tattoo reads.
During the 2018 season, she began to challenge players in the way Joe did with his passionate, selfless approach.
"I never pictured myself being able to recover like I was forced to do," said Kristen, whose team is ranked 16th in the nation and opens this season at home with two matches Friday and a Saturday match against Arizona State at 12:30 p.m.
"There's not a day I don't miss him or think about him. I feel blessed to have had the time I did because he changed my life in a lot of ways. I don't know if he ever truly knew the impact he had on people."
