4 ever: Ceremony pays tribute to Frayer

Oscar Frayer called Grand Canyon home, a fitting title for a place where the Bay Area native spent nearly his entire adulthood.

Frayer's favorite room within that home was GCU Basketball Practice Facility, where teammates, coaches and friends gathered on its court Tuesday night to celebrate a life that is difficult to let go. A week earlier, the GCU graduate, older sister Andrea Moore and friend Caley Bringmann died in an I-5 car crash northwest of Lodi, California.

Memorial setup

In a gym often lit by Frayer's infectious smile and infinite joy, the lights were dimmed Tuesday night so he could shine once more. A video screen captured his beaming opening image of a GCU tribute video, viewed more than 1.1 million times on social media in the past week, that starts with Frayer saying, "I'm just O, baby."

But he was so much more. That is what prompted coach by coach, player by player, friend by friend, to take the podium and speak below a scoreboard with only 4s, Frayer's uniform number, and a Havocs wall mural that always pictured GCU students in No. 4 jerseys.

For all of his on-court prowess for four Lopes seasons, Tuesday night's memories and homages were all about Frayer's persona.

"I just never saw a selfish bone in his body," GCU President Brian Mueller said. "I saw the joy that came from him when he played basketball. You could tell how much he loved his teammates and you could tell how much his teammates loved him."

Sophomore teammate Gabe McGlothan shared memories that he had kept in a journal, where he wrote that the bigger victory after a win was watching Frayer ask to lead the team in The Lord's Prayer and seeing the coaches beam through it.

Junior teammate Rashad Smith helped attendees laugh through grief for Frayer, even as Smith also grieves over losing Bringmann, his friend since he played basketball and she played volleyball at Pima Community College. The 21-year-old Arizona State senior's parents, Skipp and Jill Bringmann, found comfort in attending Tuesday night's ceremony at GCU.

Frayer guided the Lopes in the shadows, helping calm junior teammate Dima Zdor at times, making Australia native Jayden Stone know joy and the feeling of a second family and relating to senior transfer Sean Miller-Moore because the roommates both lost parents at a young age.

"He never stopped from telling somebody that he loved them," Miller-Moore said. "Even on the first day, he was like, 'All right, gang, love you.' And I was thinking, 'I don't know you.' But I'm honestly glad that he surrendered his life to Christ before he passed away and I am glad that on Sunday I was able to hug him and tell him that I love him."

That moment came two days before Frayer's death and a day after Frayer started in GCU's first NCAA tournament appearance, the culmination of an amazing stretch in his life. After being out of the program for academic ineligibility, Frayer was offered a chance to return by head coach Bryce Drew after his hiring a year ago.

Frayer earned an A grade in his final class to complete his Communications degree in February and celebrated WAC regular-season and tournament championships in March.

Oscar Frayer

"The one thing that sticks out to me more than anything else is this picture," said Lopes assistant coach Jamall Walker, pointing to a photo of Frayer cutting the net at GCU Arena. "This picture hits me every time because I think that's what his life was about. Climbing the ladder to be a champ. A guy who got knocked down from where he was from in Oakland to academics to being on top of that ladder and cutting down the net, not to win a championship but to win in life.

"He epitomizes what this program will be about."

GCU assistant coach Ed Schilling shared the story about how he was moved to make an altar call during pregame chapel of the WAC Tournament semifinal on March 12. Frayer raised his hands to rededicate his life to Jesus Christ 11 days before he died.

"If you look at this gym and look at all the people, Oscar's continuing to make an impact," Schilling said. "He's high flying in a greater way now than he did in the arena next door."

The ceremony was recorded for Frayer's mother, Bionca Sparrow, who Mueller said will join Frayer's 7-year-old nephew to accept Frayer's degree at an April commencement. Frayer is the first man on his mother's side to earn a college degree, which he promised his mother in hopes of being a role model for his nephews.

"She said she thanks God for the teammates and the basketball program and what it's done for his life and GCU for how his life was totally transformed here," Drew said after talking Tuesday to Sparrow. "She said this was the first day in a week that she could feel some joy in hearing stories and some comfort in hearing how Oscar has touched so many people from the basketball world and on this campus and around the whole country."

SportsCenter Frayer

It has been hard for loved ones to wrap their minds around the national notoriety of Frayer's death because his loss hits so close to home.

"We didn't lose Oscar because when you lose something, you can't find it," said Bryce Wheeler, who has been a manager and creative content student worker for the team. "We know exactly where Oscar is."

With each dedication, the realization of Frayer's selfless ways became more evident. The private encouragement. The joy he took in celebrating teammates. The appreciation for others' work.

Just as he helped everyone on the court in defense, Frayer helped everyone with his zeal for life.

"I think he did God's work through his relationships with all of us," GCU Interim Vice President of Athletics Jamie Boggs said. "The thing that I realized is that none of us collectively knew all about him and that was because he didn't talk about all the things he did with all of us. He was humble. And so I will always remember Oscar as a humble servant of God."

Grand Canyon University Athletics

Players Mentioned

Oscar Frayer

Gabe McGlothan

Sean Miller-Moore

Rashad Smith

Jayden Stone

Dima Zdor

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